Wednesday, January 30, 2008
11:30 PM
I wanna hold you till I die.. till we both break down and cry.. i wanna hold you till the fear in me subsides..........
Is there anyone to turn to? Sometimes life throws you off track, you feel so lost, sad, and you don't know what you should do. I feel so sad, yet I can't show it. I feel like crying but no one'll understand. What am I to do?
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Tuesday, January 29, 2008
8:05 PM
Does it feel like sometimes, everything just doesn't go your way? Everything just seemed, well, wrong. Feels like now. No one to talk to, no one to turn to, feels so lonely.
I feel horrible, terrible, i wish i can wish away all these feelings yet i can't. And I still have to put up a happy front in front of ppl. Why? My friend said to me just now, "Hey hongmin, why doesn't your bunk always look so dark, so sad." I replied, "Well i guess it's the people in there." People judge you by what they see, and not how well they know you. I wish ppl won't judge, i wish ppl will look beyond the surface.
I feel so helpless ah!!! Look i don't even know what i'm talking abt.
I wish I can be there beside you, to hold your hand, give you a warm hug, so you'll feel better. I'm always here for you my dear.
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9:18 AM
Just came back from my COS duty. Today's COS came late, so I had to book out late cause of him. sigh. I seriously think that COS duty is a jinx or curse to me. For some reason something bad will always happen outside whenever I do COS. Almost every time, it's fucking ridiculous.
I don't understand what's going on too. Sometimes I feel so unappreciated. All the things I've done, all the sacrifices I've made, it feels like all are for naught. I feel so discouraged, so exhausted sometimes. The worst is this situation can change in the blink of an eye. Why does it always have to be like this?
Sigh, I don't know what else I should say. What else I can say. I feel so helpless. I feel everything bottle up inside me it's suffocating me to death. Where's an outlet when you need one?
4 months and 19 days to ORD.
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Saturday, January 12, 2008
2:42 PM
FOUR MONTHS and
27 DAYS to ORD! I miss my pink IC!
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9:22 PM
HI all, haven't posted it a while. Seems like most of my posts starts with that sentence. I don't really have time to sit down and blog, and maybe it's a good thing that I don't always update my blog. Everytime I do it usually means I'm feeling down and just want an outlet to let go. I remember the reason I started this blog was cause I can use it to vent all the god damn frustrations. I don't like sitting down at a place for too long, I don't like to sit in front of the computer for very long. I seriously don't understand how some ppl can do that.
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Saturday, January 05, 2008
8:25 PM
ORD date is 8th of June, 2008. That is 5 months and 3 days from today. I WANT TO FREAKIN' ORD! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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